“You’ve gotta dance like there’s nobody watching, love like you’ll never be hurt, sing like there’s nobody listening, and live like it’s heaven on earth.” ― William W. Purkey
Ziddi Tamana (meaning: A stubborn desire). It’s my alias for my blog and the web world. Because I talk about so many personal and sometimes controversial things, family and friends included, I decided a long time ago that I would keep myself anonymous or famous just by my alias.
I love to write; which is why I launched this blog in 2009. I grew up keeping a diary. By the time I hit 21 years old, I had over 15 diaries from all my experiences growing up. One stupid episode of insecurity and I burnt all my books. It was a mistake I regret to this day. That’s where this blog came into play.
Life took lots of turns since then and so did my blog. For the people who have followed me since, you’ll know how much has happened and changed in my world. For those of you who just got here and are beginning to get to know me, you can read through the “My Life” category and you’ll catch up.
2015 has brought many changes in my home, work, emotional and physical life. I’ve grown a lot since last year and have realized many new highs and lows about myself. I’ve learned that no one is as you expect them to be and no one can be as you want them to be. We have to let people be who they are and either accept them in all their glory and torment or reject them, fully, completely and in whole. There’s no point in keeping someone around if you kind of, sort of like them. There is no in between. Life is black and white and so shall our choices be.
I am an extremist. I love to the extreme and hate equally. I don’t believe in a half-ass job, relationship, goal or anything of the sort. I either give myself fully or not at all. Most people don’t like that about me. And I really couldn’t care less if they do or don’t. Life is too short to care what others think, what others expect, what others say. This is my life and so I live it my way; if you like it, stay and enjoy the experience, if you don’t, there’s a door I’d happily slam after pushing you through it.
I am who I am and there isn’t a soul in the world that could change, influence or convince me to be otherwise.
Knowing all of that, you are now probably wondering why I chose the name Ziddi Tamana for both my blog and myself. The reason is as simple as it is complicated. A stubborn desire to live, to get through all that is thrown at me, to not give up is the purpose of this blog. Life has been tough for me. There have been many occasions when I nearly gave up. Something inside me; my stubborn desire to live, push forward and succeed kept me moving. I never gave up.
Ziddi Tamana is about my life. It’s who I am. It’s who I’ve become. No matter what life has thrown at me, I’ve fought through it and look, I’m still here. If that isn’t a stubborn desire, than you tell me what is.
This blog represents who I am and what I believe in. You’ll find here details of all the experiences I encounter. You’ll find my opinion, sometimes unreasonable and harsh and other times sensitive and overly caring. I’ll discuss things that other people may find taboo or hard to talk about.
To be honest, you’ll either love reading my blog or absolutely end up hating me for it. But personally, it’s my opinion and not everyone has to love it. There are things in my life and world that I absolutely love and hate and cannot go without discussing. If any of those things offend or insult you, then suck it up and move on. My intention isn’t to insult or offend anyone. I just need to get my words and thoughts out into the open and if you don’t like it then just simply leave. Or better yet, stay and have a conversation with me and discuss your opinion and who knows I may change your opinion or you may change mine.
The bits and pieces you should know:
- My identity: Tamana aka Ziddi
- I’m a women aged 32 (33 in Nov)
- I live in Toronto, ON – Canada
- My ethnicity is Indian by birth and Canadian by upbringing
- I live with my husband and daughter, and am the youngest of 3 siblings
- I love music, writing, poetry, dancing, driving for endless hours without a destination and playing the slots at the casinos
- When I’m stressed, I bake like a crazy woman on crack. Yeah, 3 2-layer cakes, 40 muffins is just the beginning.
- Current status:
- Figuring out motherhood.
- Exploring ways to make more money and expand my career.
- Adding and checking off items on my bucket list.
- Understand and exploring why I am the way I am.
- Beginning to write my memoirs.