Category Archives: My Life

Life of a mom-in-training. Everything from emotional confessions, relationships details and tips and daily life.




White-wash in the TDot. 


Last night’s snow storm left a lucky winter-less Toronto in a rut. Vehicle crashes from one corner of the city to the next. Snow plow and salt trucks on overload. And traffic backed up for hours. My 15 minute drive home from work took me 45 minutes. Even then, I think I got home earlier then most other people. Vie’s parents were on their way home from mid-town and it took them nearly 3 and a ½ hours to get home. And through all of this, in my 45 minute drive, I did not see one police vehicle on the roads. Normally, during my 15 minute ride I see around 3 to 5 police cruisers. Where the hell were they last night? I guess, I’m just a little ticked off because it took me 45 minutes to get home last night and an hour and 10 minutes to get to work this morning. Maybe I’m just ticked off because the moron in front of my vehicle this morning decided to run a red light and nearly crashed into a 16 wheeler in front of him and almost caused the guy making a left to ram into the back bumper of his vehicle. Maybe I’m just ticked off because fines and costs of living in this city are going up more than most people can afford and earn. Or in actuality, I’m ticked off because the city I’ve called home and grown to love for the past 20 years is getting worst and worst as the days go by. 

Through all of this traffic and snow, the one thing that always seems to piss me off is that people think they are smarter than others. They think they are “road-warriors”. They think they “know” how to drive. And almost 95% of the time, those same road-warriors are the ones left in the ditches and rear-ending other drivers.

The way they drive their vehicles the way they do, makes me want to get a shot-gun and just kill them before they kill everyone else. I know I am being extremely harsh. But this is ridiculous. We were bumper-to-bumper last night. If some moron in front of me decided to act smart and speed up or cut off someone, he would’ve taken me, the guy in front of him, and the guys on each sides of him, with him. We would’ve all been screwed and the result would be more traffic jams, more bumper-to-bumpers and many hurt drivers just trying to get the hell home! Not only are they putting their own lives at risks but also all of those lives around them.

But the thing that really ticked me off last night was that throughout all of this there were no police cruisers on the the raods.  I mean come on! If you knew there was a snow storm on its way and you know how your cities drivers react during snow storms, would you be prepared with all your men and women on the roads, ready to take on the rush hour traffic and issues? Why were there only a limited amount of cruisers on the road when the city needs conduct? Toronto Police really needs to straighten out their act. They run around the city handing out tickets for stupid reasons throughout the week but when they should really have their asses on the road controlling traffic and moronic drivers, they are nowhere to be seen. I know there were many accidents and maybe, just maybe the police guys were at all these scenes trying to calm and control the situations. But if you know there is a storm on its way, why aren’t you

~Depressed about starting to hate T.O~ 




With this soon to come career progress, I feel like I need a new look. New hair, new glasses, new style, new ME.

I’m working on the body change but now the materialistic part of me needs to change. I got the manicure and pedicure this weekend. Next on the list, hair!

I’m thinking of a more polished hair cut with a little red. Something like the style Rihanna has going on the below picture.

But I’m thinking of adding some red to the bangs. Like an under-tone. How about the picture below? (Don’t mind my sloppy drawing)

Since my hair is already black and it’s been a few months since I’ve had it dyed, I think it will take nicely to the red color. A colleague that I work with tells me that the red will look too fake. But really? I mean, come on! Don’t women dye their hair to be someone else in the first place? If we loved ourselves so much and cherished everything about ourselves so much, then why would we “enhance” our look by getting our hair dyed? Coloring our hair and putting on make-up is a way for us to be someone we’re not. Maybe that person is just another aspect of ourselves, an enhanced more polished version of us but it’s still not the “true” or “real” us.

This colleague, well what can I say? She’s judgemental of me because I want to add red color to my hair. But she does not see how much make-up she wears to cover-up her flaws. I am not judgemental of her. The make-up enhances her features and brings out a more beautiful person (I’m only talking about appearance and in no way saying that without the make-up she would not be beautiful). Why is it so easy for her to point the finger at me, when she too is using cosmetics to enhance herself?

Why are people so hypercritical?

Anyway, back to my changes. So, this afternoon after work, I’m going to head down to Marca College and get my hair cut and colored. ( The students are  the stylists and it’s quite inexpensive. I’m on a small budget, so I’ve got to look for inexpensive ways to make changes. This probably wouldn’t be my first choice, but I’m going to be optimistic for once and try it out.

So, after the hair, I thought I would look for new glasses. Oh, by-the-way, I’ll post a picture of my new hair style once I get it done). Anyway, I went to Hakim Optical yesterday to check out a new pair of glasses and well, their styles were pretty lame, at least at the location I went to. Actually, to be quite honest with you, the experience was lame. I walked in, was greeted by a sales representative, and he asked me what I was looking for. I said, “Black frames”. He showed me 2 pairs (one being way too big for my face and the other being a men’s pair) and then told me to look around and find something myself. I found something I liked and had questions about it but the sales rep. was nowhere to be found. So, I continued looking around, hoping he was in the back or something, but he never came back and the other sales reps. were busy with other customers; so, I walked out!

That was a pretty bad experience and it’s highly unlikely that I’ll return to that store. I’m not going to opt out of Hakim optical all together because they have a good reputation for quality glasses and they have some great deals (buy one get one free). But I doubt I’ll be going back to that location anytime soon. I might even write an email to Hakim corporate office about the experience. I’ve read about Mr.Hakim and he seems like the man who values his customers and how they are treated at each and every one of his stores. I’m sure he’ll understand my disappointment with this particular store.

Ok, sorry! I know I have a habit of taking my posts from one subject to the next and then jumping back to the beginning again.

So, after the experience at Hakim Opticals, I decided to go to Ardene. Now, that experience was much better. I purchased 5 accessories for $11.50. Wow! I got a really good deal on those things. I got myself a couple of necklaces, an anklet and a set of 5 bangles. 🙂 The sales rep. was really nice too. I think I might return here soon for more goodies.

Well, I’ve got to get back to work. I’ll keep you posted on the changes and I’ll even post a picture of my new hairstyle once I get it this evening!

Until then – Ciao!

Tsk. Tsk.

Daily Food Journal!

Oh my, looking at my blog  this morning makes me realize that I have not kept my journal up-to-date in the past week or so. But that doesn’t mean that I’m not following my routine. I have my morning breakfast, my portioned out meals and snacks, no salt and no pop. Except, on the weekends its harder to follow my routine.

You see with Vie it is very easy to get caught up with other things and not realizing where the time went. We like watching TV Series. Recently, we finished watching Criminal Minds. Well, not exactly finished. But we started from Season 1, Episode 1 and worked our way all the way until the current Season. Now, when the website we watch on gets updated with the latest Episode, we watch it! But since Criminal Minds is only on once a week, we’ve started watching Bones, from Season 1, that is!

I used to be into those sappy lovey-dovey types of shows. But I don’t know what changed me. Now I love watching anything that has to do with criminal investigation, reason and cause. Forensic type of stuff. Mind you, some of the scenes are a little too graphic for me but still, the storyline to many of these shows has got me coming back for more.

Anyway, back to my food journal.

I’m not going to be writing it any more. I’ve decided that if I am going to be “good” and follow my routine, then I cannot write about it. Writing about it or at least keeping a log about it makes it a chore and I hate chores!

So, I’m eliminating the Daily Food Journal category from my blog.

Hey! Don’t judge me! I am a new blogger and I’m allowed to flip and fold when I see that something isn’t working for me.

Up to this point though, I haven’t found my calling, yet. What I mean is, I haven’t found that ONE thing that interests me so much that it’s all I write about. You know, before I started this blog, I actually Googled: How to be a blogger. LOL. Stop laughing. I’m not a dork. I just didn’t know what it took to be a blogger. But the funny thing is that many of those websites, blogs and forums all said the same thing: Look for a specific topic that interests you.

I haven’t found that topic and quite frankly, I doubt I will. I just like to write. I like doing research too but only when I feel like it. Not when I’m required to. So, to sum up this post, lets just say you’re stuck with me babbling about whatever comes to mind!


p.s. I’ve moved all the Daily Food Journal posts into Everything Else.

Sanjay Dutt


When thinking through my list of fav celebs, I found it extremely difficult to decide which celeb I am going to begin talking about first.    

Would I pick the hottest? The oldest? The most famous? How would I decide?    

I went back to the collage I made on the Celebs page and stared at it for a long while. Wow, Preity has the cutest smile. Rani and Priyanka can transform one sec into sultry the next into innocence. Sush with her charismatic. Kajol with her ability to win your heart time and time again. SRK can cause you to fall in love in seconds. Sha sha with his “the boy next door” innocent smile. Aamir and his witty sense of film choices. Abhi with his east meets west styles and Sanju with his strong masculine presence.    

So, who do I choose? Fortunately, for Sanju, I’m strongly attracted to older men.    

Sanjay Dutt

 The older he gets, the sexier he looks. Sanjay Dutt is the winner for being my number 1 post on Bollywood celebs. I’ve picked Sanju because he’s talented, although his Munna Bhai movies are one too many. The first two movies were great, but now producer Vidhu Vinod Chopra and director Rajkumar Hirani are just pushing the movie plot a little too far. The latest of Munna Bhai (MB chale America) is just a dull, over-used series, in what we hope, is the last of the sequence.    

But Sanjay Dutt is a strong, bold man. His presence intimidates people. His piercing gaze keeps you at the edge of your seat. I think it’s the intoxicated eyes that keep me coming back for more.    

I met Sanju once in 2003 or ’04 in T.O. He was on a North American tour with Sallu and Bipasha (and a few others who I cannot recall). His single performances and duos with Sallu were the best I’ve seen. He had me dancing in my seat. Lucky for me, we had backstage passes and passes to the after party. Now, I must tell you, I am gaga over Sanju. He blew my mind in Khalnayak. His bad ass character in Kante had me awake at night fantasizing. For as long as I can remember, Sanju has always been my number one!    

So, of course, if he was going to be in T.O, I was going to be there, close and personal! (che…not like After one of his performances with Sallu, we were waiting back stage. As you can imagine, there were many other girls falling all over him. I’m not the type to jump on an actor or run after him for an autograph. I’m more of the type to say hi, shake his hand, and maybe get a picture of myself and him together.    

So, as Sanju was walking to his dressing room, pushing through the crowd, I approached him. He didn’t even smile. There was a hotter girl standing slightly behind me and Sanju pushed me out-of-the-way and grabbed her arm to talk to her and take pictures with her. 😦 I was heart-broken but I tried again. But still no response, no acknowledgement. Sadly, I told my friend, let’s get out of here. This is a total waste of time. Unless you are “model-like”, he’s not going to notice you. And this was true. It wasn’t just me who he pushed away. Any girl who wasn’t “hot” he didn’t acknowledge her.    

Sadly, that was the last memory I have of Sanju. Although, he will always hold a small place in my heart, he is not the man I thought him to be.  Regardless of how many people say that Sanju is a good man, he is kind at heart, etc.; the fact of the matter is that he does not respect his fans equally. Ass and tits are what matter to the man, not loyalty, respect and love.    


The reason I chose Sanju as my first choice, regardless of the experience I had with him, is still that he is an extremely attractive, strong man. He has a strong presence in the industry and his ability to act is that of a rare kind. He is a talented actor and an asset to Bollywood. I still give him ****/5.


I just remembered to check that lotto max ticket during my lunch. Sadly, my ticket was not in one of the winning tickets. 😦

Bubye goes all those fantasies and dreams. For the moment, at least! 🙂 I’m still determined. Not to win the lottery, but to earn every thing.

Just thought, I’d update on the winnings! 🙂

Lottery tickets

Yesterday on my way to work I stopped in to the near by convenient store. I was out of cigarettes. As I was waiting to be served, my eyes wandered across to the big blue lottery machine. Lotto Max at $10 million. OMG. Now,  I must tell you, I’m not the type to buy lottery tickets often. I do gamble at  the casino, but only once in a blue moon.

So, back to the lottery machine. $10 million got me thinking where that could take me. The two minutes I stood there staring at that machine took me away to a world which meant I wouldn’t have to wake up at 5:30 am every morning to get ready for work. It meant I wouldn’t NEED to go to work for most of my life, unless of course I really wanted to. It meant my parents and Vie’s parents could retire without all the worries of having enough after retirement. It meant my siblings and their children could live comfortably without worries of not having enough for the future. And lastly, it meant Vie and I could travel the world, live lavishly, have our own businesses and just relax in life.

$10 million could be very well spent. “Excuse me, do you need something?” I’m brought back to reality by the cashier. I ask for a pack of Belmont Milds and just as she’s about to punch it in on the Interac machine I say, “Wait, can I have a Lotto Max with Encore?” She says sure and rings me up. $5 for the lotto ticket and $1 for encore. Not a bad investment if the outcome is $10 million.

So now I have to wait until Friday to find out if all my dreams and fantasies are about to come true. Lotto Max only pulls numbers on Friday and that too, at 10pm. Sigh! 4 more days to go.

On my drive to work this morning my lottery ticket gets me thinking and questioning myself about why I bought it. So why did I buy it? I think it’s because I’m feeling a little stuck in my career. I have a decent job, but I don’t see myself moving anywhere. I’ve planted my feet well in my current position. I know my bosses think highly of me but it hasn’t proven enough to get me that promotion or raise.

Vie isn’t working right now. He got laid off at the peak of the recession in June last year and honestly, he hasn’t even tried looking for work. I understand. He worked for 3 years straight as a contract employee with no vacations or breaks. He needed a break and I don’t blame him for it. Plus he is getting employment insurance. It’s not as much as his full-time salary would have brought in but its helpful. Honestly though, I can’t even say that we’re broke because we spend and waste a lot of money; which in the end leaves us pretty much hand to mouth.

Instead of winning the lottery, Vie and I could just stop over spending and put some away for a rainy day. But that wouldn’t be ideal. Meh! I guess I’ll be waiting for Friday with anticipation! Keep you fingers crossed.

Brain Freeze

Just when I’m all go and ready to write, my brain freezes and I cannot think of a damn thing to write about. Run to twitter and Facebook. Post a new status: “brain freeze. looking for topics to write about.” And guess what? No one suggests anything. I have over 200 people on my Facebook connects, over 35 on twitter and not a single person suggests anything. Almost makes me want to remove everyone. But I won’t! It’s Friday night. I get it. People are out.

Second attempt: Call Vie up, ask him for suggestions. “I dunno” How sad is that? He’s too busy reading up on the latest mmorpg. He’s distracted.

Hang up with him. Come back to WordPress. Decision made!

I’m going to write about having nothing to write about. Even if no one reads this, I still know I had a brain freeze today and wrote about it.

Brain’s over working now! Why am I so enthusiastic about writing? What will come of it? Travelling back into my childhood. My diaries. OMG my endless hours of bickering, rage and silliness all complied into cute little journals.

I was born to write! I could have been a writer. Not an artist or an under-paid office worker. I was destined to WRITE!

Looking further into my childhood reminds me about what I always wrote about. No, it wasn’t the little fantasies that most girls have. No, it wasn’t about the latest crush. It was all about pain. Emotional. Physical. Is that what I’m good at? Writing about pain? Is it that easy to write about all the sad, pitiful things that happen in our lives? None of my memories recall writing about love or happiness. I remember the tears when writing. Why did I miss noting all the good things? Why did I emphasis and give so much importance to all the crap that happened in my life over all the little happy moments I felt?

I don’t know if it’s possible or not to remember all the happy memories. However, I must. Maybe another post. Maybe another day.

If I remembered, if I wrote about it; would I be someone else today?