Category Archives: My Life

Life of a mom-in-training. Everything from emotional confessions, relationships details and tips and daily life.

Sanjay Dutt


When thinking through my list of fav celebs, I found it extremely difficult to decide which celeb I am going to begin talking about first.    

Would I pick the hottest? The oldest? The most famous? How would I decide?    

I went back to the collage I made on the Celebs page and stared at it for a long while. Wow, Preity has the cutest smile. Rani and Priyanka can transform one sec into sultry the next into innocence. Sush with her charismatic. Kajol with her ability to win your heart time and time again. SRK can cause you to fall in love in seconds. Sha sha with his “the boy next door” innocent smile. Aamir and his witty sense of film choices. Abhi with his east meets west styles and Sanju with his strong masculine presence.    

So, who do I choose? Fortunately, for Sanju, I’m strongly attracted to older men.    

Sanjay Dutt

 The older he gets, the sexier he looks. Sanjay Dutt is the winner for being my number 1 post on Bollywood celebs. I’ve picked Sanju because he’s talented, although his Munna Bhai movies are one too many. The first two movies were great, but now producer Vidhu Vinod Chopra and director Rajkumar Hirani are just pushing the movie plot a little too far. The latest of Munna Bhai (MB chale America) is just a dull, over-used series, in what we hope, is the last of the sequence.    

But Sanjay Dutt is a strong, bold man. His presence intimidates people. His piercing gaze keeps you at the edge of your seat. I think it’s the intoxicated eyes that keep me coming back for more.    

I met Sanju once in 2003 or ’04 in T.O. He was on a North American tour with Sallu and Bipasha (and a few others who I cannot recall). His single performances and duos with Sallu were the best I’ve seen. He had me dancing in my seat. Lucky for me, we had backstage passes and passes to the after party. Now, I must tell you, I am gaga over Sanju. He blew my mind in Khalnayak. His bad ass character in Kante had me awake at night fantasizing. For as long as I can remember, Sanju has always been my number one!    

So, of course, if he was going to be in T.O, I was going to be there, close and personal! (che…not like After one of his performances with Sallu, we were waiting back stage. As you can imagine, there were many other girls falling all over him. I’m not the type to jump on an actor or run after him for an autograph. I’m more of the type to say hi, shake his hand, and maybe get a picture of myself and him together.    

So, as Sanju was walking to his dressing room, pushing through the crowd, I approached him. He didn’t even smile. There was a hotter girl standing slightly behind me and Sanju pushed me out-of-the-way and grabbed her arm to talk to her and take pictures with her. 😦 I was heart-broken but I tried again. But still no response, no acknowledgement. Sadly, I told my friend, let’s get out of here. This is a total waste of time. Unless you are “model-like”, he’s not going to notice you. And this was true. It wasn’t just me who he pushed away. Any girl who wasn’t “hot” he didn’t acknowledge her.    

Sadly, that was the last memory I have of Sanju. Although, he will always hold a small place in my heart, he is not the man I thought him to be.  Regardless of how many people say that Sanju is a good man, he is kind at heart, etc.; the fact of the matter is that he does not respect his fans equally. Ass and tits are what matter to the man, not loyalty, respect and love.    


The reason I chose Sanju as my first choice, regardless of the experience I had with him, is still that he is an extremely attractive, strong man. He has a strong presence in the industry and his ability to act is that of a rare kind. He is a talented actor and an asset to Bollywood. I still give him ****/5.


I just remembered to check that lotto max ticket during my lunch. Sadly, my ticket was not in one of the winning tickets. 😦

Bubye goes all those fantasies and dreams. For the moment, at least! 🙂 I’m still determined. Not to win the lottery, but to earn every thing.

Just thought, I’d update on the winnings! 🙂

Lottery tickets

Yesterday on my way to work I stopped in to the near by convenient store. I was out of cigarettes. As I was waiting to be served, my eyes wandered across to the big blue lottery machine. Lotto Max at $10 million. OMG. Now,  I must tell you, I’m not the type to buy lottery tickets often. I do gamble at  the casino, but only once in a blue moon.

So, back to the lottery machine. $10 million got me thinking where that could take me. The two minutes I stood there staring at that machine took me away to a world which meant I wouldn’t have to wake up at 5:30 am every morning to get ready for work. It meant I wouldn’t NEED to go to work for most of my life, unless of course I really wanted to. It meant my parents and Vie’s parents could retire without all the worries of having enough after retirement. It meant my siblings and their children could live comfortably without worries of not having enough for the future. And lastly, it meant Vie and I could travel the world, live lavishly, have our own businesses and just relax in life.

$10 million could be very well spent. “Excuse me, do you need something?” I’m brought back to reality by the cashier. I ask for a pack of Belmont Milds and just as she’s about to punch it in on the Interac machine I say, “Wait, can I have a Lotto Max with Encore?” She says sure and rings me up. $5 for the lotto ticket and $1 for encore. Not a bad investment if the outcome is $10 million.

So now I have to wait until Friday to find out if all my dreams and fantasies are about to come true. Lotto Max only pulls numbers on Friday and that too, at 10pm. Sigh! 4 more days to go.

On my drive to work this morning my lottery ticket gets me thinking and questioning myself about why I bought it. So why did I buy it? I think it’s because I’m feeling a little stuck in my career. I have a decent job, but I don’t see myself moving anywhere. I’ve planted my feet well in my current position. I know my bosses think highly of me but it hasn’t proven enough to get me that promotion or raise.

Vie isn’t working right now. He got laid off at the peak of the recession in June last year and honestly, he hasn’t even tried looking for work. I understand. He worked for 3 years straight as a contract employee with no vacations or breaks. He needed a break and I don’t blame him for it. Plus he is getting employment insurance. It’s not as much as his full-time salary would have brought in but its helpful. Honestly though, I can’t even say that we’re broke because we spend and waste a lot of money; which in the end leaves us pretty much hand to mouth.

Instead of winning the lottery, Vie and I could just stop over spending and put some away for a rainy day. But that wouldn’t be ideal. Meh! I guess I’ll be waiting for Friday with anticipation! Keep you fingers crossed.

Brain Freeze

Just when I’m all go and ready to write, my brain freezes and I cannot think of a damn thing to write about. Run to twitter and Facebook. Post a new status: “brain freeze. looking for topics to write about.” And guess what? No one suggests anything. I have over 200 people on my Facebook connects, over 35 on twitter and not a single person suggests anything. Almost makes me want to remove everyone. But I won’t! It’s Friday night. I get it. People are out.

Second attempt: Call Vie up, ask him for suggestions. “I dunno” How sad is that? He’s too busy reading up on the latest mmorpg. He’s distracted.

Hang up with him. Come back to WordPress. Decision made!

I’m going to write about having nothing to write about. Even if no one reads this, I still know I had a brain freeze today and wrote about it.

Brain’s over working now! Why am I so enthusiastic about writing? What will come of it? Travelling back into my childhood. My diaries. OMG my endless hours of bickering, rage and silliness all complied into cute little journals.

I was born to write! I could have been a writer. Not an artist or an under-paid office worker. I was destined to WRITE!

Looking further into my childhood reminds me about what I always wrote about. No, it wasn’t the little fantasies that most girls have. No, it wasn’t about the latest crush. It was all about pain. Emotional. Physical. Is that what I’m good at? Writing about pain? Is it that easy to write about all the sad, pitiful things that happen in our lives? None of my memories recall writing about love or happiness. I remember the tears when writing. Why did I miss noting all the good things? Why did I emphasis and give so much importance to all the crap that happened in my life over all the little happy moments I felt?

I don’t know if it’s possible or not to remember all the happy memories. However, I must. Maybe another post. Maybe another day.

If I remembered, if I wrote about it; would I be someone else today?