Tag Archives: Emotional

Happy Birthday Little Nephew

Dearest Nephew, I wish you all the love in the world. I wish you tons of happiness and success and growth.

You are the son I never had and you are one of the most dearest people in my life. I know I don’t show it as much as I should and that’s mostly because I don’t know how to act around children, even my own Nid leaves me all confused at times; but know that I love you more than you’ll ever know and more than I’ll ever show.

Your maasi will be here for you whenever you need a little push and whenever you need a place to go just to be yourself and have fun. But I’ll also be here for you when you’re doing something wrong, I will be the one to kick your butt for it and then I will be your guidance and your strength and make sure whatever you do in your life, you succeed at it. I will be that friend you can come to when you’re scared to talk to your mom or dad. I’ll be that reassurance when you can’t find yourself in the dark and I will hold your hand and walk with you through every scary, dark tunnel and into the rays of the sun.

For you my dear, are a part of me and hold one of the greatest spots in my heart.

I love you, Ujji and even if I don’t show it enough, don’t you ever forget that.

Happy Birthday sweetheart!

~ Maasi ~ Tamana

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What Changed?

Someone asked me this question yesterday, “what changed? You seem different now.” They said I had a glow to my face, a sparkle in my eye and a confidence that hadn’t been there for a long time in any of my pictures. “So, what changed?”

Someone else asked me if I had someone new in my life; someone bringing out the beauty in me. I laughed and said “yes, there’s someone in my life but they aren’t new; I just lost them for a while and found them again.” She honestly thought I was cheating on my husband and had gone back to an ex-boyfriend or something.

I explained to her, it was nothing of the sort. I told her I didn’t have time for anyone new or old back in my life right now. She looked dumbfounded at me and asked what the fuck I was talking about.

I continued to explain, I found myself again; the same self I allowed to disappear behind all the people and things I was so happily wasting myself and energy on. I cut so many toxic and negative people and things out of my life. I needed to make peace with myself.

“I gave you more than I gave myself. So loyal to you that I betrayed myself.” – Cardi B

It took me a long time to realize that the battle wasn’t between me and the world, but instead it was between me and myself.

And I won.

The next day, everything changed on it’s own. My charisma was back, the sparkle and glow returned. The waking up in the morning with a smile on my face became a part of my life again. And most importantly, I slept; not for an hour or two, but a full night’s sleep, without interruption.

So, to answer your question about what changed, I chose me, again. That’s all that needed changing.

~ Tamana

Familiar Stranger

Have you ever met someone and felt like you had known them all your life? Like the two of you just connect and everything fit perfectly in place? You didn’t realize what level you connected on or what to think of it all while they were around.

And the funny thing is, before that day you didn’t even know they existed and now all of a sudden you know this person, you connected with them on some weird spiritual, intellectual or emotional level and then they’re suddenly gone from your life again without even as much as a goodbye.

You’re stuck wondering if they felt the same or were hit with that same connection. But you can’t ask them because you don’t know in which corner of the world they suddenly moved to and where they’re going on with their life. They’ve disappeared just as easily as they appeared into your world. You can’t ask anyone about them or search them up because there are some people out there that aren’t keen on wanting to be found or exploiting themselves all over social media like the rest of us.

I recently met a familiar stranger and now that person has disappeared and I’m left wondering if I lost someone that was supposed to be a part of my life and world, I think I lost a friend before they became one.

I have no way of contacting them except once I told them about my blog and I’m hoping my familiar stranger bothered to look it up and will read this post eventually and know I’m writing about them and get back in touch with me. ~ Tamana

First Day Of Grade 1

My little darling, Nid, you continue to amaze me every day with how smart and loving you are becoming.

As you begin a new chapter in your life, I want to wish you wisdom and strength. I want to wish you laughter and friendship. I want to wish you happiness and compromise. But most importantly, my darling, I want to wish you love.

Senior Kindergarten was a tough year for you on so many levels. You experienced bullying; some done to you and some done by you. You experienced uncertainty when learning a foreign language. You experienced separation anxiety when you were first put on the school bus. You experienced, independence when asked to bring home your uniforms and containers daily. You experienced growth when given homework every Friday.

My love, you rose above all your obstacles and shined brighter than the North Star. You proved my uncertainties wrong and excelled in everything you took on.

This year, as you enter grade 1, I want to wish you this one prayer:

Dear Lord:

Thank you for the gift of my child.

Please watch over her as she goes back to school and protect her from negative influences.

Help her to be a light to others and help her show love, care, and respect to her friends and teachers.

Please protect her from bullies but if she faces one, give her courage to stand up for herself and others.

Help her to remember that when she is scared, You are with her. As much as I love my child, You love her even more and I know You will be watching over her. Amen. 🙏🏼

I love you, little lady and hope you have an amazing grade 1. Xoxo

~Tamana

A Beautiful Celebration Of Love

“and once in a while, in ordinary life, loves throws you a fairytale…”

My best friend is married to a beautiful girl and I have a new best friend and sister to welcome into my family.

It has been an extravagant weekend, completely full of drama, tears, overjoyed love, happiness and gratitude. What started as a joining of two hearts has become a joining of two families and welcoming of tons of new friends.

From the start of the celebration to the end, I have been blessed to meet so many amazing people, especially my personal new squad (you know who you are; Triple S). You guys were my support system during the haldi ceremony and totally took the lead on decorating the groom’s car. You three are my rockstars! I love you guys for that! You have become a part of our family and we are so thankful for the three of you.

As for everyone else that was involved in making this day special for my brother and sister-in-law, I say thank you for all your efforts, love and compassion. These two are blessed to have such amazing family and friends by their sides.

For my two newlyweds, I wish you endless love and happiness. I wish you a beautiful happily ever after and pray your love prospers in every way. Always remember I’ve got your backs and will do anything and everything for the two of you. Both of you hold one of the highest and most important places in my heart.

May each new day find your hearts a little closer, your lives a little fuller and your love a little deeper!

Love you two dearly!

Congratulations again, Mr. & Mrs. Vig!

#mrmrsvig

6 Years and Going Strong (Amen)

Thank you for being my rock during these years. I look forward to spending the rest of my life with you and making more beautiful memories as we have done so far.

Thank you for being that special person I get to annoy for the rest of my life.

Love you ~ Xoxo

~Tamana

Bell Let’s Talk Day: Mental Health Awareness

For the last eight years on January 31st, Bell Let’s Talk Day has opened up the conversation of mental health. It was an initiative to remove the stigma around mental illness.

In my culture and community, mental illness is still a taboo. We don’t openly speak about depression or mental health issues; you’d be quickly labeled as mental or retarded (for a lack of better word). Which is why the Bell Let’s Talk Day is so important for me.

It’s no secret that I’ve battle with depression and mental instability over the years. Anyone that’s read my blog or knows me personally knows what I’ve gone through and how I’ve struggled to overcome my depression. So for me a day to openly admit and discuss how mental illness affects my life is a day I can’t take for granted.

Mental illness is not a bad thing. Each one of us faces some sort of mental illness throughout our lives. It is now time we speak about it openly and stop hiding behind the masks that everything is okay and that if we speak about our mental struggles people will label or judge us.

Today, let’s check in with our loved ones and open up the conversation for mental health. Every text, tweet or social media conversation with hashtag #BellLetsTalk 5 cents will be donated towards mental health initiatives. Open up the conversation and do your part to make sure you and your loved ones have the support they need when they are struggling.

~Tamana